Sunday, January 24, 2010

Herpes Doesn't Mean the End of Your Dating Life

By Jayde Johanssen

You're just back from the doctor, and the tests confirmed your fear: you've contracted herpes. It might take a little time to get used to the idea that you'll have this Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI) for the rest of your life, but it's certainly not the end of the world. Folks that have herpes are just like everyone else; the only difference is that they need to exercise a bit more caution before engaging in sexual activity.

First, we'll start with a bit of an introduction. Herpes is a virus that is transmitted when an infected person engages in sexual activity with a partner. It's important to note once more that, at least for the moment, herpes doesn't have a cure, and stays with the host for the rest of his or her life. Sporadically, the virus manifests itself into blisters and sores that can be itchy and irritable.

So how does this affect one's dating life? From the outset, you'll need to be honest with potential partners. Before any sexual activity at all occurs, make sure they fully understand how herpes works, what it does, and their risks of contracting the infection if they engage in sexual activity. You don't have to do this on the first date, but make sure to bring it up sooner, rather than later. That means not waiting until you're back at his (or her) place, ready to get it on. Pulling this kind of move will almost always result in an angry partner walking out the door, often not to return.

Also, be sure to check out sites and services tailored specifically to people who carry the herpes virus. Think about the many benefits associated with going through these kinds of sites; there's nothing left to chance. Everyone knows upfront the risks of getting involved with another infected person, and you'll never have to endure the awkwardness of explaining what herpes is all about. This could also be your chance to find someone who can provide emotional support.

Folks with the herpes virus don't always show symptoms, but it's still crucial to let potential partners know the deal, regardless of whether you have sores or not at the time.

When you do suffer from an outbreak, make sure to avoid having sex. The chances of passing along herpes are much greater if open sores or blisters are visible. There are certain drugs on the market that work to control your outbreaks. Though they can be quite expensive, there is no price on making sure that you're protecting your partner as best as possible.

And of course, always wear protection. Condoms aren't bulletproof in this situation, but they certainly go a long way towards keeping you and your partners safe. Herpes is just one of the many STD's out there; others include AIDS and Hepatitis, both of which have very serious consequences.

In the end, remember that if someone is really meant to be with you forever, they'll accept this one small part of what makes you a unique person. Don't let herpes dictate your life. It's only something else to consider as you head into the dating world.

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